John Alan Turner

Speaker, Author, Mentor, Coach, Facilitator

Please Accept John as a Friend

I recently updated my address book using one of those online places. It sent out email to everyone in my address book asking them to input their information, and then it sent me an email to confirm that they should be on my list. The subject line to the email I received said, "Please accept (insert name here) as a friend." That sounds so sad, so needy. Please accept me as your friend. When I clicked on the link offered by the email, I'm given the option: accept or reject.

So far I haven't rejected anyone. I wonder what would happen if I did. I wonder if it would send them an email saying, "John has rejected your offer of friendship. You are a loser."

We all long to be in the "inner ring" that C.S. Lewis talked about -- one of the cool kids. The pain of adolescent rejection stings even into adulthood. Few things are as powerful as acceptance.

I am on a journey. If you've read this blog very long, you know I'm wrestling with some deep questions that might go unanswered for some time. Some days are up and some are down -- there are peaks and valleys on this journey. I cannot imagine going through this solo. I thank God for friends (old and new) and family and -- best of all -- my wife who travels with me always.

I shared with the folks at last weekend's retreat that I'm convinced her "word" is faithful. She's faithful not just to me but to everyone -- friends, family, my kids, people on television. She's always ready to give someone the benefit of the doubt. She's always the last one willing to believe bad things about others. She embodies the word faithful in a way I've rarely seen in my life. She's my wife, my lover, and -- best of all -- she accepts me as a (best) friend.